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The UK’s sexiest places have been revealed and it’s bad news for Greater Manchester

Turns out Manchester is pretty kinky…

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Love Honey UK has released a ‘UK Sex Map’ which documents just how sexy a city or town really is. 

Naturally, I was straight on there to see just how dirty Manchester and all the surrounding boroughs really are. 

As it turns out, we’re all pretty filthy!

Although we don’t make it into the top 10, not even the top 100, compared to Liverpool which ranked at 501, Leeds at 382nd place and Hull in 504th, a nice 157th place for Manchester is pretty good going. 

It turns out Sale-folk like things pretty vanilla in the bedroom, only coming in 719th place. Salford’s pretty beige too, with their sexy encounters coming in just after Sale at 720. 

Stalybridge comes in at 569, and are more likely to order vibrators, roleplay costumes – particularly school girl – and anal toys. They like things XL with an average dildo size of 7.25 inch. 

It turns out the people of Altrincham love being minty fresh with their favourite lube flavour of mint, and having a fantasy about sexy secretary costumes. It comes in at the 536th sexiest place in the UK. 

Bolton is the 468th sexiest place with an average dildo size of 7 inches. Bolton also comes in at 428th place for strap-on affinity. 

Bury-folk like a good old seven-inch dildo, just like Bolton, but come in 416th place for anal toys.

Love Honey

Beating them all though is Cheadle, coming in as the 19th sexiest place in the whole of the UK, you kinky little so and so’s! 

It turns out the people of Cheadle are regular purchases of bondage items, ranking 10th in the whole of the UK, 20th for vibrators, 25th for Butt Plugs and 30th for Roleplay products. 

The most popular searches by people in Cheadle include – but are by no means are limited to – lube, cock ring, vibrator, latex and sleeve.

They, like most places, are opting for a fresh mint flavoured lube and seven-inch dildos but have a very strong affinity for French Maids and Butlers in their wildest fantasy dreams. 

Dukinfield has got a particular dream about schoolgirl costumes, but comes in at a pretty low 606th on Love Honey’s sexy scale. 

Love Honey

Heywood like ’em big, with the average dildo coming in at a huge 7.5 inches, and Heywood-folk come in a pretty nice 600th place for butt plugs. 

The city centre, on the other hand, comes in 157th place, placing in the hundreds for roleplay, butt plugs, vibrators, bondage and anal toys. City Centre people enjoy mint lube and 6.5-inch dildos. 

Wigan ranks shortly after the centre in a respectable 163rd place, but actually ranks 87th in the country for roleplay items and 131st for vibrators. 

Hyde and Oldham all like simple fantasy and roleplay costumes and are pretty average for the sex toy orders. Rochdale is pretty similar on all accounts but opts for a seven-inch dildo. 

Find out where your town ranks on the Sex Map here.

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Councils can offer homeless people cash and food vouchers to get Covid vaccine, government confirms

In England, homeless people are a group with a very low vaccine uptake

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Homeless people across England can be offered cash and food vouchers in exchange for getting the Covid vaccine, the government has confirmed today.

Eddie Hughes, the minister for rough sleeping, said councils could use part of the government’s £28m ‘protect and vaccinate’ scheme to incentivise vaccinations for those on the streets in the first scheme of its kind in the UK, the Local Government Chronicle reported.

The new funding will go towards delivering mobile vaccinations where people are sleeping on the streets, supporting outreach work in shelters to educate people about the dangers of the virus, and to councils to provide accommodation.

Hughes said homeless people are a group with very low levels of vaccination, pointing out that there is likely to be a degree of ‘vaccine hesitancy’. 

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He explained: “So we’re making an additional pot of money available to incentivise vaccinations for this group. This funding will help local authorities and their partners to use their understanding of the needs of rough sleepers to increase the vaccination take-up.

“Incentivisation will be at the discretion of local authorities but could include transport, subsistence, childcare and support workers’ costs.

“So I want to be clear, you will have considerable support to do this.”

A spokesperson for the Department for Levelling Up, Housing and Communities added: “The discretion given to councils include[s] the ability to offer cash or food vouchers as incentives for vaccination.”

Jon Sparkes, the chief executive of homelessness charity Crisis, told Inside Housing that the new funding is ‘incredibly welcome’ and ‘will help to protect the lives of people facing the most vulnerable circumstances.’

Greater Manchester Mayor’s Charity

He said: “Through our frontline services, we know that vaccination rates amongst people experiencing homelessness are particularly low.

“This could prove fatal for many when also coupled with other health issues and the physical impact of spending night and day on the streets in the freezing cold.”

Just one month ago, new figures showed that at least thirty-three people died while sleeping rough in Manchester during the 2020 pandemic.

While this statistic is down from the fifty-one recorded deaths in 2019, it is still 65% higher than the twenty homeless deaths estimated in 2013, when the figures were first collected.

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Morrisons will now ban shoppers without a mask unless they’re exempt

BREAKING NEWS

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Jim Barton / Geograph

Morrisons will now no longer allow shoppers in stores without a mask unless they’re medically exempt.

The supermarket Morrisons has now confirmed that customers who refuse to wear a mask will be told to leave the store unless they can provide a medical exemption.

Chief executive David Potts said: “Those who are offered a face covering and decline to wear one won’t be allowed to shop at Morrisons unless they are medically exempt. Our store colleagues are working hard to feed you and your family, please be kind.”

This comes after shopworkers’ union USDAW said it was ‘inundated’ with complaints from members who were ‘deeply concerned’ for their safety, as the public often ignore Covid rules. 

Rept0n1x / Wikimedia

England’s chief medical officer said earlier that the next few weeks will be the worst of the pandemic, pleading with the public to minimise the amount of unnecessary contact with people not in their household. 

Speaking to BBC Breakfast, Chris Whitty added: “This new variant is really pushing things in a way that the old variant, which was already very bad, was not able to. So we have a very significant problem … The next few weeks are going to be the worst weeks of this pandemic in terms of numbers into the NHS.” 

Vaccines minister Nadhim Zahawi also voiced his concerns that the public were not complying with the measures put in place by supermarkets. He said: “I am worried about supermarkets and people actually wearing masks and following the one-way system and making sure when it’s at capacity they wait outside the supermarket.”

The Union of Shop, Distributive and Allied Workers (USDAW) general secretary, Paddy Lillis said: “Retail staff are working with the public every day and not only suffer increased abuse, but are deeply worried about catching Covid-19.

“Where safety measures are agreed, retailers need to make sure that they are being followed consistently, in every store. We are also very concerned by reports that too many customers are not following necessary safety measures like social distancing, wearing a face covering and only shopping for essential items.”

New tighter rules are also now reportedly being considered by the government, six days after the national lockdown was implemented. 

The Telegraph reports that a ban on households mixing is being considered by ministers as well as the possible introduction of face coverings in offices, as some businesses have apparently become ‘lax’. 

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Shoppers left ‘fuming’ after Poundland’s festive till message publicly ‘humiliates’ them

Naughty or nice?

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Poundland’s festive till alerts have been dubbed ‘humiliating’ by some customers.

Not everybody is impressed with new till alert at Poundland that put a festive twist on the automated voice.

Santa replaces the normal voice at the self-serve tills this Christmas, however one shopper was left mortified after her card was rejected and Santa started singing. 

A video of the festive alert has gone viral with many criticising it as Father Christmas can be heard warning: “Card not accepted, is it on the naughty list?

“Because I’m checking it twice, I’m going to find out who’s naughty or nice,” before singing: “Santa Claus is coming to town.”

One woman complained on Twitter writing: “Your tills are incredibly embarrassing!! Shouting out my card was declined over and over. How discreet for your customers. Not.

“All because I needed to transfer my money to the correct account, the whole shop thought I couldn’t purchase.

“Not happy one bit. Merry Xmas.”

A video has been shared on TikTok racking up over 150,000 veiws. The caption read: “So guys, I accidentally used the wrong card so it got declined – listen to this self checkout machine.

“OMG I’m absolutely screaminggggggg.

“Narrrh, I’m actually emailing Poundland HR, how f****** embarrassing.”

A person replied saying: “This happened to me yesterday! The most embarrassing thing ever.”

A fed up employee replied: “I work at Poundland and this haunts me.”

On Twitter, one man tweeted: “Bizarrely, Poundland has turned its self-service till voice into Santa.

“Just stood behind a queue of people buying binbags, cotton buds, weedkiller with Santa joyfully proclaiming, ‘Ho ho ho, make sure you get those wrapped nicely for Christmas!’ every time.”

A second added: “Shopping in @Poundland and hearing Santa’s voice on the self serve tills was the cheer up I didn’t know I needed today.”

A Poundland spokesman told The Mirror: “Santa took time out of his very busy schedule to do this. How can anyone be a grinch about Santa?

“Our seasonal checkout voices from Elvis to Yoda are part of what makes Poundland, Poundland. We haven’t lost our sense of humour despite this being an unusual year.”

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